9 Pictures of Toes Later

I have found, through nine different photos, that I do not have photogenic feet. The idea today was to show you the awesome color of toenail polish I currently have on my toes; but I was side tracked by the entire body part. I mean, damn, I have some strange feet.Yes, do note the awesome color on my toes, I’m rather pleased with it. But, let me tell you about the miniature odyssey I went on while taking photos of my feet. First, I tried to find a good angle. I took a few in the kitchen, one with my feet pressed against the oven door, in an attempt to show everyone that I do not have cankles. Cankles is a technical term, where the ankle and the calf morph into one body part. Largely seen on little old ladies. I even took a few shots with my ankles crossed; all in an effort to take a picture of my feet at a good angle. I tell you, it does not exist.

The picture above is not in the kitchen, it’s in the bathroom. If you couldn’t tell from the toothbrushes and sink. First, I shot down on my feet as I sat on the closed toilet seat. But, that was too dark because the lighting is strange in the bathroom and you couldn’t see the color on my toes, which WAS THE POINT. So, I held my feet up, over the sink, for the light and got this shot, which was the most acceptable.

If you look closely, my loves, you’ll see that I have an extremely large space between my largest toe and the one beside it. (I just scrolled back up to see what else was wrong with my toes, but got sucked back into that crevice between my toes. DAYUM.) Also, look at my pinky toe. What the eff is sticking out of the side there? I think the bones in my phalanges grow to the side like that. I get lots of blisters there too, it’s awesome. What is up with my pinkies? They look like they want to crawl up under that other toe there…

The other reason I picked this photo is because you aren’t close enough to see that hair grows on the “knuckles” of my toes, as well as a bit on the top (oh lawd, I have man feet) and the fact that I haven’t shaved in a few days and my legs are pretty dry.

Good thing I got married when I did, I must have been wearing socks through the entire courtship.



  1. Hmmm…angles, angles…try taking the photo of your feet's reflection in a mirror? That might give you a little more options. Also: CANKLES! Tee-hee. You most certainly do not have them. What your feet do have is attitude.

  2. HARDEHARHAR – You do have a way with the words. Also no stranger body than the next guy although we have no family history of hairy toes……

  3. I love this post and it just makes me want to take pictures and write a blog! I am so happy to call you family and miss your sense of humor when we visit….don't ever change & I am sure Mattew loves every part of you! Normal & odd…it is part of the package! ;-)C

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