In the month of September, I spent much of my time in an airport or in the air. This has caused me to learn several new things about myself. Strange and disturbing things. It’s now October, and I have no idea where September went, hell, I don’t know where half of October went. But, the things I have learned about myself are listed as following:
1. I am not a morning person. I don’t like to get out of bed before the sun rises. I did that consistently for about 2 weeks. Brain power is low if there is no sun for my to charge with. I’m like a solar panel. I need the sun to be up to function properly.
2. I do not have the patience I used to think that I did. I have evidence to support this, which is listed in my next personal discovery.
3. When I am required to stand in lines, I very quickly degenerate into hating everyone. There were nuns (I’m serious) in one line I had to stand in and I hated them. Children asked questions, I hated them. Adults moved to slowly, I hated them. Colleagues made inane comments, I hated them as well.
4. I have a lot of hate. I should see a shrink.
5. I tell myself I am OK with air travel, but I think that’s the denial talking. I hate turbulence, especially when you get that first unexpected drop. That’s always alarming. I’m not a fan of the landings either, because I can never figure out how they stop the plane. I know, breaks, but we were traveling so quickly – how can we be sure the inertia will be stopped? An object in motion…
Evidence: During a flight that had turbulence, I may have flailed in a rather alarming fashion on the first drop. In my defense, I was asleep and it startled me. I flailed, then gripped the armrests like Kate Winslet clung to that door in Titanic. Yeah, Strain, that’ll save you if the plane FALLS OUT OF THE SKY.
6. I am really skilled at making myself go to sleep on planes. I pretty much put my head back and will myself asleep. I think it helps that the sun usually isn’t out when I get on the plane. Please refer to self-discovery #1.
7. I like the movie Battleship. Saw it on an in-flight movie, found it entertaining.
That about wraps up my list of self-discoveries fueled by air travel. If pushed, I could probably think of a few more, but I think most of those would relate back to #4, so we’ll skip it.
What then, do you, dear reader, have to look forward to for my next post? I have no idea. Suggestions welcome.
COULD BE WORSE 